Why Your WHAT Isn’t the Problem—How to Find Clarity in Your Next Step

The clarity you’re looking for isn’t in what you do—it’s in how you do it.

In our first session, I asked him, “What are you struggling with?”

"I feel disconnected from the things I’m doing. I know it, but I don’t know how to do it differently."

"I have a lot of interests, I can do a lot of things—I can push myself to do anything. But I don’t know what to choose."

"I don’t want to make the wrong choice and close the other doors."

And I knew exactly where to go with him.

This client had already built a successful career, but he reached a point where he wanted something more. He took a sabbatical to slow down, to figure out what’s next. When he came to me, he was in that in-between space—wanting clarity on how to spend his days but feeling uncertain.

As I guided him through the Transition Clarity Process, we got clear on what truly aligns in his life—his values, his choices, and what he genuinely loves to do. And then came the big aha: despite all the doubt he’d been feeling, we uncovered that much of his life already aligned with his values and long-term goals.

So why did it still feel empty?

One of his biggest fears was: "If everything adds up, why do I still feel disconnected?" Another question that haunted him: “Should I still be on this sabbatical? What should I be doing with my days?” He was afraid of picking a door, only to find it wasn’t the right one. As someone who’s great at a lot of things—who sees endless possibilities and is in high demand—this fear felt paralyzing.

And he’s not alone. This is the case with many of my clients—successful, multi-talented, growth-oriented, and stuck in indecision. They think the problem is choosing the wrong path, but that’s not actually what’s keeping them stuck.

So, we drilled down.

The real issue wasn’t what he was doing. In fact, when we looked at his life, he realized he was already pleased with the whats. The deeper truth?

It was about the how.

The way he was moving from one thing to the next—so quickly, so cognitively—wasn’t allowing him to actually feel connected. Everything checked the right boxes, everything made sense, but it was happening entirely in his head.

So we went deeper: WHY wasn’t he connected?

This is where the real shift happened. It wasn’t about what he was doing—it was about how he was doing it.

The HOW connects the dots of the WHAT.

In one of our sessions, I guided him through a session that revealed exactly where he was stuck, what he wasn’t fully listening to within himself, and once it was revealed I gave him fieldwork to put into action and try in his life.

Together, we designed a new way for him to start his day and transition between the things he does—so that he could feel connected, present, and fulfilled, instead of just going through the motions. We continued building on this throughout the rest of the intensive and created a sustainable new way of moving through his life that became a part of him.

Since then, I’ve received messages from him, sharing how much this small shift has transformed his sense of fulfillment and connection in his day to day. That he now has a tool to use when he feels disconnected in moments in his life. The best part? It’s not just inspiring and feel good, it’s actually his and it’s sustainable.

It’s not rocket science—it’s actually quite simple- it just requires a different kind of listening. He didn’t have to change what he was doing. He just had to change how he was moving through it, which changed everything!